A very, very weird thanksgiving.

I'm feeling better than I was. I finally got in touch with my friends, who, to my delight, went to his girlfriends uncle's house yesterday before it all happened, and were, like i was afraid of, in Leopold's Cafe the night before the attacks. Had they been there at that time the next day.... or had the attacks been one day later... i don't wanna think about it. Leopold's is featured in the super famous "Shanatram" which I'd just started reading, and was excited to go there tonight after thanksgiving dinner, at about 9 :30, the same time they opened fire on the place last night kicking off a series of attacks so far killing over 100.  it is just mind boggling how close it was in a way.  kristin and i, my friend i met up with the other day, were supposed to go to mumbai today for a thanksgiving dinner with rob and stever. got frantic calls from the parents last night alerting me to the fact any of it even happened, since i am in a bubble that yesterday felt really awesome and today is tinged with a feeling of resentment that everyone has continued on their blissed out, ignorant, self serving journeys toward enlightenment and there hasn't even been an announcement made that people are dead and a city is under lockdown.  Finally talking to steve on the phone just now, i learned they'd tried me but hadn't been able to get through, tons of times, and were going into the worst of it to try to find me later when i called them. tomorrow, they are hoping to get into a taxi and drive down here to pune, pick up kristin and i, and take us to the uncle's  country house in the middle of... the country. thank god, if that happens i couldn't ask for anything more. there we were, going to take a train to mumbai, into the central train station, where there are horrible graphic pics in the newspaper of blood stained floors, and a white couple dead by the Taj pool. I ran into my friend Raynor from a couple of weeks ago here at this ashram, completely crazy coincidence, and he told me this morning that he was going to stay at the taj but declined because of a new aversion to overpriced things - helped, he said, by his recent lessons in frugality by his new backpacker friends. god its lucky he wasn't THERE.  This morning and last night I was so blase with mom because i didn't get the severity of this. When we finally moved out of our hot shower, light as a feather bed in the ashram guesthouse, down the block back to india in a little room with a tv and i could see some coverage, i was really affected. Ill tell you, knock on wood, luck has really been on our side today. And for that, on thanksgiving, i think thats reason to give thanks. I'm not in the right mood to write about the brilliant time kristin and i had in goa together, and how we tore up the film festival, im not even in the right mood to tell you about the infamous Osho Ashram, which was pretty darn cool yesterday i might add, though ive never been wearing a maroon robe with everyone else also wearing one before, or having to wear a white dress resembling a bedsheet while listening and watching the audio/videotapes of a 10 years dead Guru with a thick indian accent talking about the celebration of the joys of life, a message i totally agree with actually but today just seems self serving. I"m not in the mood, but I'll write it later. I am sad today I'm not home, sad I'm not in Boston with the traditional crew, and the artichoke dip! :), sad I'm not with Chris in Florida like I'd said I'd be, and sad that there's no turkey tonight and i think we're saving the tandoori chicken for tomorrow night. Tonight there is a japanese place kristin and i will try outside the walls of this fake utopia. I'm happy i stayed the extra days, being here and experiencing this and all these meditations is crazy and cool, my time at the film festival was awesome, and hopefully in a few days things will simmer down and i can at least hire a driver around mumbai and maybe be an extra in the bollywood movie i really wanted to do. I think the caves might be scrapped, you can't see everything, and clearly my first priority is safety. I"m so disappointed this happened, im so irate peoples lives have to end over this nonsense. Steve told me that the guy who'd measured his suit two days ago in colaba (they used to be staying next to the taj) died from a bullet through the brain last night. and today the other man is still trying to do business, in a total daze. How tragic. And I'm in a "meditation resort" that's supposed to be all about heart. Where's the vigil that should be happening tonight? My heart goes out to all those lives lost today, and to the folks from the US, who've lost their parent or their sibling this thanksgiving. Sorry for the total holiday buzzkill of a blog, but I hope you have good thanksgivings and I miss you all. Next time I"ll talk about the film festival, hopefully from a beautiful country estate. Love xoxoxxo Arjana